Tuesday, April 19, 2005

A Note on Grandpa Jones

Okay, I have finally been driven over the edge. I have allowed Grandpa Jones to comment on my blog without any checks and balances, and he is now garnering unwarranted support amongst the citizens of WilkeWorld. They are clamouring for his own blog for goodness sake. Oh, poor misguided readers! You take his sardonic comments as witty and refreshing, but you don't know the real man behind the comments. I am here to reveal to the readers of WilkeWorld once and for all the character of Grandpa Jones. I will let you judge for yourselves.

Exhibit #1
White Tennis Shoes
Worn with a white tuxedo by Grandpa Jones at his own wedding reception. He claims he didn't know the dress shoes didn't come with the tux.

Exhibit #2
MVP Award at Basketball Tournament
Won by Grandpa Jones while on his Honeymoon. How is that for romantic?

Exhibit #3
High School Report Card Showing a D in Typing
Received by Grandpa Jones following the incident when he rolled a girl's hair up in the manual typewriter and then left her there.

Exhibit #4

Wait a minute, honey. I'm finishing this blog entry about my dad.

What did he do? He mowed our lawn and took the little one to the penny candy store? Why? He didn't give a reason?



Anonymous Grandpa Jones said...

I finally penetrated that hard veneer of my eldest son. This might be the second time in all our life that I have understood what was in the heart of my son. I have to admit that all of the examples that you cited are true. But when you attack my mowing your lawn or taking the child to the penny candy store, I have to reply. First of all, when We visit your home and see that the lawn is matured and turning to seed I believe it is time to mow. Your wife was crying, the baby was yelling, I thought it was the most humane thing I could do. The grass measured 9 inches in some spots. Now to the issue of the penny candy store. When a 2 year old child can direct her grandpa to the store, can walk into the store and the clerk recognizes her by name, and they bring out the stool for her, what is a grandpa to do. When we get ready to leave the clerk said, " Riley, we will see you next week." really......I even tasted some of the candy, it was terrible, then I took her to a well known fast food outlet, I bought her a hamburger, and since I care about my weight I bought her water and put it in a cup. She tasted it and pulled a funny face and said, "Grandpa, this is water, I want Sprite." It brings into question what is she being reared on? I probably need to apoligize for what I am writing, because I truly want to continue taking my granddaughter out and I don't want any passive aggressive behavior from her parents.

5:08 AM  
Blogger Travis said...

All of your exhibits seem pretty innocent to me. Grandpa, you have my permission to take your granddaughter to the Candy Store anytime you want.

8:50 PM  
Blogger Anita said...

K - I'm sorry, but I'm totally loving Grandpa Jones.

The good news is that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, at least in so far as writing is concerned. Your blog is going to make my "Addictions" list soon if you aren't careful. I like your sense of humor.

Your dad is definitely adding a certain spiciness though . . .

11:06 AM  
Anonymous Grandpa Jones said...

It is so difficult to be a grandparent. You spend all your life learning how to be a parent, and you finally figure it out, and you try to tell your children and they don't want to hear it. They are content to make the same mistakes and love doing it. I have finally resigned myself to just enjoying the grandkids and when things get alittle overwhelming I send them home to a dysfunctional family and wait for tomorrow when I can take them to the park. Lest anyone misunderstand, I have a great family and our experiences have been fantastic. I tried to rear them to be independent, and it makes me frustrated when they actually have become that. Oh well it is suppose to be clear tomorrow, I'm going to take them to the park again.

3:28 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home